If you are not familiar with Brene Brown you should be. Her Ted Talk, books and now podcast (yay!) have been so helpful and eye opening to me. Mostly in the realm of authenticity. Deepak says “Living a life not owed by you is draining. Being yourself is the most fulfilling”. Yes, it certainly is. It’s just so obvious. I spent SO many years especially in my teens and 20’s not being my authentic self. I was really good at molding myself into whoever I was around. And I continued to do that all the way through my 40’s. For example, I mentioned before that I have bird feeders and like to bird watch. This was a hobby I kept under wraps throughout my adulthood. Why? Because I didn’t think anyone else would have an interest and honestly I thought their eyes would glaze over if I told them. But I love it. I love seeing all the different birds at my feeder. I love identifying new birds. I love tracking my life list to see how many species I’ve seen and I love going on birding walks and hikes. So, if I hid this hobby, how was I going to meet anyone else who enjoys it too? I mean, isn’t that the way to make real friendships? Not fake “let’s get a drink and do nothing else” friendships. Now, when I meet people I’m upfront about all my goofy things I like. I’m SO ME. And people can take it or leave it. It’s amazing how many people I meet who say “me too!” when I tell them something I’m really into. Ugh, so much wasted time not doing that. A long road, but I’ve learned this now. I’m only half way through my life so better to learn it now and make the change than to never have learned it!
It’s true, but until the reckoning of my late 40’s, I never attempted to be my authentic self. And it makes me sad and a little regretful of my past. But, I cannot live there. I can only look forward and be my authentic self from here on out. And in doing this, some people might drop out (and have) of my life. And that’s ok. When I really am who I am I find the right people to be around. They just “show up”. I can’t explain it!
Deepak says we need to do the following to be be our most fulfilled:
Be open and vulnerable
Have inner strength
Live in the now
This again was all the things I was working on. More reinforcement that I was headed in the right direction.
Do you feel like you are being your authentic self? How could you be more true to yourself. I suggest checking out Brene Brown’s work at https://brenebrown.com.